Online dating often promises big feelings, but sometimes it simply leads to thoughtful, human encounters. This personal dating story from Chyrpe reflects on modern dating, cross-border connections and what it means when someone shows up with genuine effort, even if the spark isn’t there. It’s about intention, communication and why a good date doesn’t always have to turn into a love story to be meaningful.
He crossed borders to see me. I just had my first date with a guy from Chyrpe and he did not disappoint. Vikram and I connected on Chyrpe when I was travelling in Germany. I was new on the app and didn’t realize my location had changed and that he lives too far away from me. But Vikram was nice, texted back swiftly and asked me lots of meaningful questions. So I texted back. Two weeks ago he told me he was going to come and visit me in my hometown.
To be honest, I didn’t believe he was actually going to show up. Wouldn’t be the first time somebody promises to travel for me and never does so. (My boyfriend of three years made me wait for him a year until I finally broke up with him but I shall not digress). Vikram did travel to another country to see me. Because he isn’t white, of course he got into a control while crossing the border. After showing all his documentation he literally told the border control officer he absolutely needs to travel to meet a girl. The border control guy thought he was crazy, but wished him luck.
The gift
Vikram was so nervous when I met him at the train station. He quickly handed me some gifts he brought, his hands were shaking. I got a mug, chocolate and Paulo Coelho’s “the Alchimist”. I have already read the book, my boyfriend of three years had gifted it to me years ago, which I thought was a bad omen, but obviously not Vikram’s fault. I gave him a traditional spice mix from my country because I knew he likes to cook.
At first, we strolled around the city. Even though Vikram told me he “just downloaded Chyrpe because he saw the ad”, I was clearly guiding through the evening. He accepted whatever I proposed, he ordered what I ordered and when I asked him whether he preferred A or B he looked at me nervously and asked me to make the choice for him. We had some good conversations, ate at one of my favourite restaurants and he was extremely keen on paying the bill. Later, we went to a historic bar downtown and I was excited to tell him which famous poets of the last century had already stayed there. We talked about family, dreams and our shared interest for sports.
The plot-twist
Dear reader, you must be disappointed in me, but at the bar I told him I’d prefer us to be friends. Even though Vikram did everything right, I didn’t feel the spark. Even though he is smart and kind and caring, it felt like talking to an old friend. The distance also scares me considerably. Vikram took the news surprisingly well. So well that I’m now questioning if he actually understood the message. We sat in the bar for another hour and then continued walking around. He dropped me off at the train station and left my city the next day.
On his way back, the same border patrol officer showed up again. They both laughed. He asked Vikram if he got scammed or if the pretty girl actually exists. Vikram showed him our selfie and the officer got excited for him. In a world of bare minimum guys, where do these guys still exist he asked. Well, they exist on Chyrpe.
